My Life

Remember me?

I’ve been taking time to process so many things. I’m sure I’ll have another period of processing soon- and then another and another and…

It’s been a joy falling back into the wisdoms of my heart, without an audience. Remembering that there is not anything I truly need other than myself and this Earth. Why don’t we capitalize “earth”?

I don’t need anyone else’s narrative of me to be “accurate”. I don’t need a lot of things I’ve allowed into my life. And realizing that anything I allow into my life is consequently allowed into my family’s life helps trim the unnecessaries.

There are many things that call my name.

family

nature

spirituality

poetry

psychology

physics

magick

The list could, most likely, go on for an eternity. Being in tune with what ignites my sparks can be a blissful or overwhelming experience. Too often I feel a passion that ends up strangled by the confines of how I can fit it into a societally acceptable, helpful package. How did it become so easy to forget that something by Me for Me is enough? Why don’t we capitalize “me”?

Part of my dilemma is feeling pulled to help. I chose a career in humanities and did a wonderful job going beyond my duties in order to find what “being a great teacher” really meant to me. I didn’t fully realize it when I started, but I think I can understand what I was doing a little bit more now that I’m not doing it everyday.

This is my perspective on the matter:

We all hold a universal essence inside of us. When religions talk about “eternal life”, I think they are often hinting at this spacial aspect of ourselves. A glowing soul that watches our experience and experiences it with “us”. The true You. It’s decided to allow free-will of an ego you’ve long called home. It has learned not to rock Chaos back into awareness until all are ready to see a deeper truth. Adults have a much, much more difficult time getting back to their essence. Of course we do. Years and years of trauma and coping mechanisms leaves most of us sitting, wondering “who Am I?”

I think we are Light living in Chaos. And, when teachers, parents, caring humans take their awareness and share it with a child, all are reminded of the Light they are. Light holds a lot of power. We hold a lot of power. For better or for worse, we do. Chaos holds the same weight, though. Sometimes it can feel significantly heavier than our Light and maybe that’s because of the way it imprints on our ego. Chaos getting pounded with more Chaos. Either way, it comes down to what power we want to hold after allowing ourselves to become aware of the potentials we are all capable of obtaining. You get what I’m saying?

And because they don’t have decades of hardships chipping out neurotic pathways to a depth that’s hard to comprehend, kids are much more accepting of their true powers. They just need someone to enter into their life that doesn’t just say it, but believes it too.

Any topic that gets me thinking often leads me back into a quantum galaxy within my mind. I believe everything is interconnected, so maybe that’s why.

This familiar mental journey does pull me into thoughts full of rabbit holes and that’s what I often love to write poems about. My next post will be of some poetry I’ve written, on the countless perspectives my mind offers me. Take it or leave it, but it’s helped me think about where, who, and what I Am.

I have a lengthy list of books that have also shaped my ever-changing perspectives on life, if anyone ever wants recommendations in that category as well.

Thanks for reading.

Take care of the planet and share love with the universe.

Peace and progress,
-Kait

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